You said you are sorry,
You said you know how it feels.
You said you don't know it will hurt,
But you see the wound is bleeding.
Perhaps you will know..
Perhaps you already knew..
Perhaps you are just ignorant..
Perhaps it was intended..
I said I hate you, most of the time I do. But why must every time I love you even more. Perhaps you already know how much I try to avoid the heartbreaking, then why should you deliberately mocking me? Perhaps you enjoy making me hurt to make yourself feel better...
You have released too much hate that I avoid all these years... The hate that I never knew, the jealousy that I do not desire..
Yet, what should I do? My mind is now too messy to think it straight. It is filled with hate that I do not know where it came from..
I feel betrayed from the least expected person in this whole incident. Don't I know what is hiding behind those entire apologies? Or I should just be a dummy and smile back and act nothing happened?
There is a moment I meant to say forever good bye. When you said good bye, I will just fly away as far as I could. I will never actually say "Good bye" unless it will be the end of my life....
My heart is full of rage; it is filled with red blood that bleeds within...
Don't I know it when there is no word spoken? Or perhaps you do not know how to say it? No matter how much I hate you, you will never know how much I love you...
I am speechless; I have nothing left to say. I don't know how to explain to make you understand how much it hurts. Perhaps I am the fool. Yes, I am that fool who wait for you..
Perhaps you will know.
But you never really understand it.
Tell me, what should I do? Was that the way you wish me to go away? Did you want it to be the last? If you only waiting for my forgiveness all these time do know that I always forgive you. If that is what you waiting for, now please let me know if I am a burden all these times?
Perhaps it’s about time I know… You said I always had wrong presumption. I always misunderstood. I wish I could understand you better… or perhaps you do not wish it the way I do..
I am sorry for being such huge burden in your life. I am sorry for stopping your life. I am sorry for making your life more complicated…. Do I need to apologise further? Please let me know what I did wrong.
My mind tells me to go away, but my heart can’t let go. Only if I knew, perhaps I will know what to do.
Probably you think this is just another fun note to read. For me, it is another unbearable day in my life. Maybe it will cheer your life, but it really kills me inside. If that is what you wish, I have nothing else to say.
Perhaps you should know… I always waiting for your calls at each time I miss you… I always waiting but most of the time, I have to make a call first. It is because I know that you will not call unless you promised it earlier. Yesterday, today, still I am waiting for your call…and perhaps you do not know, I am still waiting…
Maybe, you do not know…. But I am sure of one thing, you will try to make me happy. However, I will never understand why is it necessary to make me feel happy? Does it come from a sincere intentions? I will never know...
You said you know how it feels.
You said you don't know it will hurt,
But you see the wound is bleeding.
Perhaps you will know..
Perhaps you already knew..
Perhaps you are just ignorant..
Perhaps it was intended..
I said I hate you, most of the time I do. But why must every time I love you even more. Perhaps you already know how much I try to avoid the heartbreaking, then why should you deliberately mocking me? Perhaps you enjoy making me hurt to make yourself feel better...
You have released too much hate that I avoid all these years... The hate that I never knew, the jealousy that I do not desire..
Yet, what should I do? My mind is now too messy to think it straight. It is filled with hate that I do not know where it came from..
I feel betrayed from the least expected person in this whole incident. Don't I know what is hiding behind those entire apologies? Or I should just be a dummy and smile back and act nothing happened?
There is a moment I meant to say forever good bye. When you said good bye, I will just fly away as far as I could. I will never actually say "Good bye" unless it will be the end of my life....
My heart is full of rage; it is filled with red blood that bleeds within...
Don't I know it when there is no word spoken? Or perhaps you do not know how to say it? No matter how much I hate you, you will never know how much I love you...
I am speechless; I have nothing left to say. I don't know how to explain to make you understand how much it hurts. Perhaps I am the fool. Yes, I am that fool who wait for you..
Perhaps you will know.
But you never really understand it.
Tell me, what should I do? Was that the way you wish me to go away? Did you want it to be the last? If you only waiting for my forgiveness all these time do know that I always forgive you. If that is what you waiting for, now please let me know if I am a burden all these times?
Perhaps it’s about time I know… You said I always had wrong presumption. I always misunderstood. I wish I could understand you better… or perhaps you do not wish it the way I do..
I am sorry for being such huge burden in your life. I am sorry for stopping your life. I am sorry for making your life more complicated…. Do I need to apologise further? Please let me know what I did wrong.
My mind tells me to go away, but my heart can’t let go. Only if I knew, perhaps I will know what to do.
Probably you think this is just another fun note to read. For me, it is another unbearable day in my life. Maybe it will cheer your life, but it really kills me inside. If that is what you wish, I have nothing else to say.
Perhaps you should know… I always waiting for your calls at each time I miss you… I always waiting but most of the time, I have to make a call first. It is because I know that you will not call unless you promised it earlier. Yesterday, today, still I am waiting for your call…and perhaps you do not know, I am still waiting…
Maybe, you do not know…. But I am sure of one thing, you will try to make me happy. However, I will never understand why is it necessary to make me feel happy? Does it come from a sincere intentions? I will never know...
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